The Pseudo Interest in Life and Other Beings

What is life?

That singular question has been occupied some part of my head for quite sometimes. I did not think life is just how we breathe, how we eat or how we obliged to dealing with other people, plants, or animals just to survive. But, whatever that is, the idea of life itself just to bizarre to defined.

I remember a quote that saying “Some of us born just to observe”, and I couldn’t more agree with. Some of us born to be the vital part of the life, to be happy, to be sad, to be in love, raising a child, having a big family and all, contributing and functioning like any other human being, filling up these atmosphere with emotions. While on the other hand.... I do believe that there were individuals on this earth that just there to observe. Watching how the universe and anything in it works. I didn’t talk about scientist of any related kind of job…Just people who observe their surroundings and the essence of life itself, learn something from it, until they feel it’s enough and wait their turn to disappear into the tiny bits of atoms in the galaxies.

Suzanne by Auguste Leveque (1866-1921)

My whole life, I’ve been an observant and I think God placed me into this earth to observe other being but do not intervene. I do feel like enduring such a strong emotion just seems too much for me. I like watching people, plants, or animals… always wondering why they acts such that way. Why do they did what they did.

 I just need the answers for all the why’s in me.

Something about human and any other beings that I find so exotic intrigued me to observe them. The idea to watch, to learn without experiencing myself seems intoxicating. But there’s always something in between, a sheer glass or fabric that separated me from the rest of it all, like I was in the different dimension, close but not quite close.

The idea of life itself-the idea of living that this society have obliged us to endure scares me, let alone being part of the show-biz society with it’s picturesque and fictive qualities. If I had a chance….If only I had the chance…I’d rather be something flying around in the skies like some sort of fog, or wind, or simply the last smoke of a beaten cigarettes. No color, no shapes, no scent, just exist.